Chapter 24: Teddy is Good at Everything

I finally wrote a new chapter. Yay? I hope so. I started it a long time ago but then didn't finish until now. It's finished now. OK go.

Clang. Clang. Clunk. Silence, until…

“Noooooooooooooooo! You used your genius powers to cheat!” Blue wailed, throwing her air hockey striker across the table at Teddy in frustration. After the first game, Blue claimed Teddy won because he was red and she was white and red always wins so they had to switch and play again. In the second game, she was convinced the puck had been upside down and made her game all off so they had to turn it over and play again. The third time Blue was convinced the air hockey gods had been mad at her, or something she was sure made as much sense at the time, so they had to do a dance to appease them and then they had to play again. The fourth time she finally understood what was happening.

“Stoooop-uhhh,” she whined at Teddy, “using your genius powers to win isn’t fairrrrr.”

He shrugged and laughed at her, “I’m sorry. Would you like me to lose on purpose?”

“Lose on porpoise?” Blue shrieked, appalled at the very suggestion, “Why, how dare you, sir? To suggest I would accept the indignity of winning a game in a way that isn’t entirely fair. Madness, sir! Madness!” After her rant was finished, Blue waved her arms wildly and ran around the room. Once she’d calmed down slightly, she flopped face first onto the rec room couch, mumbling something into the cushions that became incredibly muffled.

“What are you telling the pillow, Blue?”  Teddy asked, glancing out the rec room window as he walked over and sat next to her. Blue pulled her head up from the pillow and followed Teddy’s gaze outside. Since it had warmed up, a few of the guys had taken to playing basketball on the court next to the rec room, including Malik and Pablo. They played shirts and skins, naturally (when Estela or any other females played with them they were automatically on the “shirts” team”), and on this day Pablo and Malik were both on the skins team. Teddy and Blue, therefore, had to stop and admire their boyfriends for a while before they could continue the conversation. They stared as their boyfriends continued not quite knowing how to interact with one another and managed to awkwardly bump into each other even though they were on the same team. Kip laughed and dribbled around them as they tried to decide whether to apologize or to just go on with the game.

“We know how to catch them,” Blue admired as she and Teddy laughed at the awkward half-pat Malik gave Pablo’s arm (the one he ran into) before returning to the game. Before Teddy got the chance to agree, Blue shrieked, “No! Stop being good at picking a boyfriend! And stop being good at picking a best friend!” Teddy couldn’t be sure whether Blue was referring to herself or Malik, but he supposed it didn’t matter. As far as Teddy cared, they were both his best friend and they were both fantastic.

“I’ve got it! You’re no good at basketball, right? Play me!” Blue demanded, and Teddy shrugged.

“OK,” he agreed. Leading Teddy outside, Blue ran into the middle of the basketball game and started swatting at the ball. Malik caught her around the waist while Pablo called a time out, and Teddy laughed. While Malik listened to Blue explain that she needed their basketball “for because Teddy needs to be pwned, bro!” Malik proceeded to explain that they were in the middle of a game and Blue should probably wait for the game to be over. She then claimed that if they were really good at basketball they could stop her from stealing the ball. This launched them into a playful argument, while the rest of the players wondered when they would get to start playing again.

Pablo walked over to talk to Teddy and started saying something, but Teddy stared at his naked torso instead of listening. “Teddy,” Pablo prodded, poking the blond in the head.

“If we weren’t in public I would—,” Pablo cut Teddy off with a finger to the face and an amused smirk.

 “I’m flattered and all, but those guys over there can most likely hear you, and things would get sort of weird with them if you continued on with that,” Pablo advised, though he was secretly very happy to hear Teddy say such things.

 “Ha!” Blue announced, running over to Teddy and Pablo and tugging Malik along with her. “you want to see who’s better at inappropriately propositioning their boyfriend in public?”

Pablo let out a half-snort half-laugh and rejected the idea, “I’m not going to explain why that’s a bad idea, Blue. We need to get back to the game now.” Blue pouted excessively as Pablo and Malik turned to rejoin the game that picked back up while they were away.

 “There’s another basketball right there,” Teddy advised, bringing a grin to Blue’s face, “and we can play at the open hoop. No need to steal a ball.”

 “OK,” Blue agreed. Soon, Blue and Teddy were swatting at each other and “playing basketball” together. It was hard to say exactly what happened, but Blue and Teddy were under the impression that Teddy won. Pablo and Malik finished their game just in time to see Blue sing obnoxiously at Teddy to distract him from his “free shot” which was “part of basketball” and “not made up.” Free shots were taken when the opponent stepped on your foot and you managed to step on their foot at the same time really quickly. Despite clearly making up their own rules as they went along, they somehow came to a consensus at the end of the game neither Malik or Pablo could follow that insisted Teddy won. Blue whined about it as the four of them walked back toward their dorm rooms, and explained her plan to find something Teddy wasn’t good at. When asked to define what “not good at” meant, Blue officially defined it as something Teddy lost to Blue at in direct competition.

 “Well I have some ideas,” Malik offered.

 “Malik has known me too long, that sounds like cheating,” Teddy rejected soundly.

Malik gave Teddy his sassiest eye roll, “That doesn’t seem fair.”

Frowning, Blue considered whether she would use Malik’s ideas. Once she agreed to accept his ideas, Blue banished Teddy and Pablo from the room so she and Malik could plot in peace. By the end of the day, they had a fairly cohesive list, and Teddy agreed to attempt one task per day until Blue finally beat him at something.

Challenge One: Racing

Planning time: “Teddy has never won a race in his life,” Malik offered as he and Blue plotted.

“I’ve never run a race in my life,” Blue replied, “but how hard could it be? On the list.” Malik was too dumbstruck by what Blue revealed to comment further.

Race day: The race, as dictated by Blue, who “would prefer not to run farther than about twenty me-tres” and “won’t accept corrections” to “pronunciation skills that” she “learned in elementary school,” was from the dorm building to a tree approximately nineteen meters away. Malik was in charge of waving the checkered flag Blue had drawn onto a piece of printer paper. Pablo was in charge of judging at the finish line. At Blue’s instruction, after a few things she called “stretches,” she and Teddy lined up on the start line she’d created by dragging her foot through the grass a bunch of times.

Starting the countdown after a nod from Blue, Malik waved the “flag” when he finished, and the pair were off. The first couple steps, Blue was pretty sure she was going to win. She was ahead sort of. Teddy was a couple steps back kind of. Suddenly, her best friend’s long, surprisingly gazelle-like stride overtook hers, and she started sweating. Game over, she decided, as she slowed to a walk for the last five meters to avoid sweating more, which she still sort of suspected was her brain leaking. Teddy crossed the finish line, and she scowled at nothing in particular and kicked a tall tuft of grass, falling off to the side of the finish line and not completing the race at all.

“Teddy wins,” Pablo stated, though it wasn't exactly necessary.

Challenge Two: Pogo Stick Jumping

Planning time: “You know those hoppy sticks?” Blue asked, tapping her face with a pen. The thought brought Malik back from his bafflement that Blue had never run a race, as he pondered what she might mean.

“Uh…,” he trailed off, thinking. Taking the opportunity to perhaps spark a thought in Malik’s head, Blue tapped his face with her pen. He laughed and swiped at the pen as he thought of the name Blue was going for, “Pogo sticks?”

Pogo day: Teddy found some pogo sticks from some kind of stash the principal apparently had (he believed they would become very valuable someday), and the pair faced off in the courtyard. Pablo was in a rehearsal this time, but Malik was very obediently supporting his girlfriend’s pointless pursuits and his best friend’s willingness to go along with them.

“OK,” he stated, with a referee title given to him by Blue, “each of you will get three attempts to bounce more times than the other. Teddy will start, because Blue insists that she’s a gentleman and gentlemen let their competitors go first.”

The blond frowned at the pogo stick, shrugged, and managed two bounces before falling off to the side and landing awkwardly. Snorting, Blue laughed and took her turn, sure she could get more than two bounces. She fell over entirely after one bounce. Teddy took his next turn then, and managed three bounces this time. Blue fell after one again. It all came down to the last round; one moment for Blue to prove she was better than Teddy at pogo bouncing, one moment for Teddy to not be good at something, one moment for Blue to be better than her genius friend. Blue threw pieces of grass in Teddy’s direction to mess him up, as he sighed and balanced on the pogo stick one last time, bouncing three times again. That was it, then: Blue needed four bounces and this endless competition would finally end after hours and hours of exhausting struggle. Breathing deeply, Blue put one foot onto the foot holder of the pogo stick, then the other, and fell over sideways, screaming out, “Noooo!” as she fell.

Malik and Teddy stared in silence until Malik declared, “With, uh…Let’s go with an impressive score of four bounces, Teddy wins!”

Challenge Three: Remote-Controlled Helicopter Driving

Planning time: “I wish being a pilot could be a challenge,” Blue suggested, “I could beat Teddy at that I bet…Wait, we could fly my tiny helicopter you gave me!”

“Blue, you can barely get it to stay up in the air,” Malik replied, but Blue chose not to hear him.

Helicopter day: A short obstacle course lay in front of the competitors, as Blue attempted trash talk at Teddy to get into his psyche. “You’re all thumbs, can’t fly this thing at all!” she taunted. Teddy decided not to remind her the helicopter’s remote was driven by thumbs only, as Malik handed the helicopter remote to him. He, as the impartial party in the matter, was also in charge of setting the helicopter up in the same place for both of them, atop a nice looking rock Teddy and Blue jointly decided on.

Once again, Teddy was to go first, since Blue was still in a gentleman kick (she was also holding all doors open for others, pulling out seats for other people, and forcing them to go in front of her in lines; she missed lunch a couple of days because she kept forcing other people into line even if they were walking past for an unrelated reason). Malik still had the checkered flag from the earlier race, and he waved it to signal that Teddy should start. After Malik stepped out of the way, the helicopter lifted off the ground, headed for the other end of the courtyard.

“You’ll never make it,” Blue trash-talked, “you were born to be a dancer, not a helicopter pilot!” Malik and Teddy shared confused eye contact, but Teddy managed to get past the strange statement and not crash the helicopter. Landing the tiny vehicle safely on the other side of the courtyard, Teddy grinned and smirked at Blue, who glared and stated, “You’re ignoring your destiny!”

Laughing, Teddy went to pick up the helicopter, and returned it to Malik, who prepared it for Blue’s turn. She grabbed the remote from Malik, and eagerly awaited the start signal. Once Malik waved the “flag” and stepped aside, Blue started pushing on the two joystick-like appendages sticking out from the remote. Flying into the air, the helicopter turned around and aimed itself straight for Malik, who tried to sidestep it but ended up with a helicopter to the nose.

“Teddy wins,” he stated, as Blue shrugged and laughed at his irritated face.

Challenge Four: Cooking

Planning time: “Maybe I should pick the next one?” Malik suggested, and Blue shrugged at him.

“OK, what do you think?” she asked, tilting her head and smiling.

“Cook something,” Malik stated, smiling like he had some sort of memory he should be sharing with Blue.

Once Malik recounted some adventures of “T&M’s Kitchen of Cooking,” he and Blue continued on in their plotting.

Cooking day: This time they were in Kakahi’s house, and the violin prodigy and her girlfriend would be the judges in the competition. Her younger siblings, Link and Gizmo, insisted they be judges in the cooking contest as well, claiming Kakahi and Estela probably wouldn’t be completely impartial like they needed to be, so they should balance it out. Also they were hungry. Link entertained everyone by playing the ocarina while Teddy and Blue cooked the dish Kakahi had chosen for them: cookies. They could be any kind they wanted, and all the ingredients they might want were provided by the rich Verde family. For the first time, they met Kakahi’s parents, who edged in on the contest as well.

Finally, Blue and Teddy presented their creations to the then six judges. Both batches of cookies (chocolate chip) looked sadly pathetic, and Blue and Teddy broke out in laughter when they saw each other’s shoddy work. The six judges received their cookies, and within a few minutes they made their decisions and turned their votes in to Malik, who was still entranced by Link’s ocarina. Once he was reminded he was the “host” of their food contest, Malik counted up the votes. Once he had the count, he taste tested the cookies as well.

First, he bit into Teddy’s cookie. It was decent, he decided. Next, he bit into Blue’s cookie. It tasted like salt, and he spit it back out. “Teddy wins, five to one,” he declared. Kakahi winked at Blue, telling her who’d voted for her, as Malik ate the rest of Teddy’s cookie and glared at Blue’s like it personally offended him.

Challenge Five: Turtle Whispering

Planning time: Once Blue and Malik were done laughing at Teddy using salt instead of sugar in his first ever batch of cookies (as if Blue would ever mix those two up!) they got back to planning. Suddenly, Shelly shifted in her cage, and Blue gasped, “Turtle whispering!”

“What is that exactly?” Malik asked, and Blue rolled her eyes affectionately.

“Oh, you,” she laughed, patting Malik’s head and ruffling his hair.

“What?” Malik repeated, fixing his hair.

Turtle day: Blue and Teddy sat on either side of Blue’s room, with Shelly the turtle placed in the center. This time Malik was sitting on Blue’s bed, only vaguely paying attention to the contest, while Kendall served as referee. “OK,” Kendall said, “begin the turtle whispering in three…two…one…go!”

“Here Shelly, Shelly,” Blue cooed, tapping the floor to try to attract her turtle to her.

Teddy stared at the turtle and then stated, “Shelly, if you come over here I’ll take you to visit Scamps.” The turtle, surprising everyone in the room, turned and walked straight over to Teddy. Blue was too busy blinking in shock at her turtle’s intelligence to move as Teddy scooped the pet up into his arms to make good on his promise.

 “Teddy wins,” Kendall mumbled, seeming just as confused as Blue, who started incoherently muttering about super intelligent animals. Malik was surprised as well when he realized it was over already.

Challenge Six: Math(ing)

Planning time: “I’m pretty good at mathing,” Blue stated.

Malik frowned at her and replied, “You know he’s a genius, right?”

 “But I get all As in mathing,” Blue informed her boyfriend. It was true, actually. One surprising thing Malik had learned about Blue over time was that she earned pretty impressive grades, and math happened to be her best subject. His only problem was that it was also Teddy’s best subject. Arguing didn't seem worthwhile, though.

Math day: “OK, multiplication tables,” Malik said, handing a sheet to Blue and a sheet to Teddy. “I’m not sure how else to test mathing, so…Here you go. First person to finish the front and back is the winner. Don’t look at either of them until I say go.” Teddy and Blue nodded eagerly as they prepared, and Malik started counting down. “Three, two, one…go!” The competitors started, as Malik glanced across the room to a couple of people he didn’t recognize and stared at them intently until Teddy declared himself done. Blue finished not too far behind, but it ended up being too late.

 “Teddy wins,” Malik stated, as Blue threw her pen toward her best friend.

Challenge Seven: ?

Planning time: “That’s probably enough, right? I should win after six probably, right?” Blue asked.

Not wanting to disappoint his girlfriend, but pretty sure she was wrong, Malik replied, “Why don’t you try one last thing?”

? day: Teddy walked over to Blue, not aware of what the contest would be this time, as he met her backstage in the auditorium. His best friend looked sad that she’d lost so many times to him. “You know this stuff doesn’t matter, right?” he asked, and Blue nodded.

“Yeah,” she replied, “it’s the principle, though.” The principle, Teddy supposed, was more to do with Blue’s confidence than some desire she had to crush his.

 “You’re better than me at a lot of things,” Teddy insisted, and Blue tilted her head and listened to him, “like being a good, genuine person, acting on camera, and most definitely being a gentleman.”

Grinning, Blue held her arms out to Teddy and hugged him, “You are good at all those things, too, Teddy. I love you. It’s because I love you that I must now crush you.” Teddy tilted his head to the side when Blue backed away from him and led him onto the stage. It took only a couple seconds for him to realize what was happening and turn very pale.

 “Karaoke,” Teddy mumbled under his breath, freezing in place. The spectacle that followed wasn’t fit to be shared, as Teddy made some barely audible sounds he insisted were singing while their friends watched. Blue easily out sang her best friend, and then opened the stage up to the rest of their friends to join in on the karaoke fun. As an act of revenge on Teddy’s behalf, Blue invited Malik onto the stage and made him sing a duet with her, which resulted in Malik hiding behind his girlfriend on the stage and trying to turn invisible.

They had fun, though, as Rashida and Pablo serenaded them all with a romantic ballad. The Twingers took over to sing some Spice Girls jams with Kip and Kakahi, and Gerda sang something in Swedish that she only laughed when asked to translate. Next up was Hakan, who made some attempt at rapping for the group, and Jenny brought down the house with a ballad. Everyone cheered, and Blue and Teddy made fun of Malik until Kakahi needed to take the karaoke machine home. The group walked back to their dorms, Blue mocking Malik’s and Teddy’s singing skills as they argued they were just taken off guard and could sing better if they had prep time. Despite this, they both rejected a plan for more singing later, and Blue declared, “None of us is good at everything!” as if it was profoundly important. At that moment, it kind of felt like it was.